Faux Pas

A faux pas is defined by Wikipedia as "a slip or blunder in etiquette, manners, or conduct; an embarrassing social blunder or indiscretion."  As quick as I am to avoid fashion faux pas, I often accidentally commit social suicide when I violate the social norms and cross into social faux pas territory.

One of my biggest flaws is that I am horrible with names.  If I don't have you on Facebook, and your name is not written near your face somewhere, it is very likely that I won't remember your name.  In fact, when you say "Hi my name is Blah", by the time I say ,"nice to meet you", I have no idea what you said your name was.  You could introduce yourself numerous times with different names and it would take me a while to cotton on. 

At my current workplace I have incorrectly accused someone of being a PA, not that there's anything wrong with that, but the person in question was a manager more senior than myself.  Just today I asked someone if we had met before, despite the fact we have actually had an entire conversation before.  I swear I am just not good with names and faces.  


At least I profusely apologise for my social faux pas.  Nobody ever apologises when they commit a fashion faux pas.  If you commit the below offences, there's no one you can apologise to enough to make it okay.

Shrimp Cocktail Toes

This occurs where your open-toed shoes are too small, and your toes hang over them like a shrimp cocktail.

Canadian Tuxedo
Also known as the denim sandwich, or denim on denim.

Track suits on fat people

Please don't dress like you're going to the gym when you haven't seen one in years.

Leggings as pants

Leggings are not pants. 

Also tights are not leggings.

Jeggings have no place in the world

Side boob

Especially droopy side boob, I'm sorry gravity has caught up with you.  Not even the men want to see that.

What are your most hated fashion faux-pas?

Corporate Fashion: Plaid

Fall/Winter 2011 runway shows taught us that plaid is back in fashion.

Me and plaid are not the best of friends, since I wore a plaid blazer for most of my schooling career, but that doesn't mean we can't make up.  The most important thing about plaid is to remember not to wear it like you live on a farm.  The farmer does not want a wife!!

Burberry Prorsum

Paul Costelloe

Versus

Carven

Plaid is not traditional corporate wear.  In order to bring it to the office, items should be tailored.  For women, plaid should be worn in feminine shapes such as tailored dresses, coats and skirts, not as a daggy shirt from the op shop.

mmm.. sexy plaid man

plaid cape on Blair

Knowing Australia is always a little bit behind in the fashion stakes, it's often hard to find key trend pieces.  I hate it how trends flood retail stores seasons after the particular trend has already come and gone.  However, plaid, being a classic item, is easy to find if you look hard enough.

Cue Check Pants $259.00

Country Road Long Sleeve Check Dress $229.00

Witchery Pintuck Shirt Dress $99.95

Vero Moda 50's Style Belted Tartan Dress $61.65

Nishe Tartan Ruffle A Line Skirt $30.83

If it's all a bit too daunting, maybe you can just try a check headband?

Fashion Update

Oroton has new shoes

Originally I thought:

Does Oroton think I am stupid??  There is no way I would pay $295.00 for their plain black or nude heels.

A few hours later I think:

Oooh they have a jacquard embossed sole... maybe I should buy them.

I KNOW that this is not a good deal, but I'm slowly turning over to the dark side.  No one will even see the sole of the shoe,  yet this has become a deciding factor on whether I like the item.  I inherently trust the Oroton brand for comfort, style and quality; and how can I resist a shoe named "essentials"?

The offending shoe

Vogue $39 for 12 month subscription 

Just purchased this deal.  How could I resist such a cheap offer?

Vintage

Etsy  has a lot of horrible vintage clothing with a few bargain beauties hidden in the stack. 

Vintage Wedding Dress $450.00

Mink Stole $195.00

Office-Appropriate Jewellery

Accessories are the perfect way to express your personal style within the corporate bounds of "office-appropriate".  Look to other professional women in the office to see how far you can go with your accessories.  Most companies are quite conservative and will appreciate if you wear accessories that are closer to the conservative side of the spectrum. 

Classic and feminine accessories are easy to pull off in the office.  It's much easier to find work appropriate flower earrings, than it is to find work appropriate skull earrings.  In fact, there are probably no skull accessories you should ever be wearing to work. 

Office Jewellery Tips

• Do not attempt to bling yourself out like you are going to be in a Hip Hop video.  
• Avoid wearing large amounts of "hippy" jewellery that make you look like the type of person who has a "magic happens" bumper sticker.  
• Please don't wear numerous bangles that clang as you type away in the cubicle next to mine; no one should ever hear or smell you before they see you.
• The office is not the set of a Bollywood movie, even if it was, you would not be the star, so stop dressing like it.
• Men, please do not wear your Mr T gold chains to the office,
• and guys can you stop making "pearl necklace" jokes?

Trending Jewellery

Marc Jacobs Bow Wow Wow Anabella Hinge Bangle

Marc Jacobs Skinny Hinge Bangles $64.90 each

Veblen's Vice Commodore 1764 Signet Ring $120.00

Irregular Choice Pandora Ring  £35.00

Louis Vuitton Commit Bracelet $315.00

Hermes leather bracelet

Chanel Bracelet

Shopping

Also, just so you know Diva is has an "under $5" sale on at the moment.  There are quite a lot of items available for cheap!!  Here's what I got for $18.00:

Earrings $3.00

Earrings $2.00

Hairclips $5.00

Bracelet $3.00

Necklaces $5.00

Vogue's Fashion Night In

Wednesday June 8 is Vogue's Fashion's Night In

From 5-11pm Vogue is hosting an online shopping night. Heaps of retailers are participating and will be offering great deals on the night.  I will probably buy many items.

Are tattoos acceptable in the workplace yet?

Tattoos are very common for Gen Y.  We don't even look twice when we see someone with a tattoo.  Having a tattoo seems to be a prerequisite to work at some places (like JB HiFi).  Not to mention that Angelina Jolie and Jessica Alba have tattoos, and it hasn't injured their careers.

But for all of us younger workers, we have to embrace the fact that there are still some older Australians who are not comfortable with tattoos.  As a corollary to this, our bosses and managers may in fact be those kinds of people.  When they were growing up there was stronger stigma regarding tattoos.  Women with tattoos were seen as slutty trailer trash types and men with tattoos were definitely criminals. 

I do understand that there are some tattoos you could never pull off in the office, for example, swastikas, facial tattoos and profanities.  In client situations, as the face of the company, it's probably not a good idea to have any tattoos peeking out of your shirt either. 

Nothing wrong with hiding this under your shirt...

For a few generations to come, it's still going to be necessary to cover up your tattoos at work.  In fact, the more conservative professions like accounting and consulting will probably always be too conservative for tattoos.  Most of these companies are fine with tattoos that are covered up. 

If you're considering a tattoo, best not to get it anywhere that you can't cover up with your work clothes.  Another good tip is to get the image you like, stick it up on your wall, and if you still like it in a year, you can get it tattooed on your body; if you don't like it anymore, thank god you didn't get it done when you wanted it. 

Until tattoos become acceptable in the workplace, don't get any that will require you to wear opaque stockings and long sleeve shirts for the rest of your career. 

Corporate Fashion: Geek Chic

So according to Westfield, Geek is Chic at the moment.  Having been somewhere between the definition of geek and nerd my entire life, I'm hoping that being me might become popular at some point this season.  Aren't we all a little bit geek nowadays, LOL-ing in the office and facebooking our locations?

As far as I can tell the whole Geek Chic movement centres around wearing thick rimmed glasses.  It also involves fully buttoned-up shirts, checkered patterns and anything related to things geeks like, such as pac-man. 

Since being pretty is the most important thing in the corporate world, followed by being intelligent, I think that Geek Chic is definitely a look to pull off in the office.  Looking smart and sexy at the same time is the name of the game.

The Glasses

Anne Hathaway

Justin Bieber

Jennifer Aniston

Socks and Heels

Buttoned Up Shirts

Geek Accessories

In other news: The rapture appears to be running late.  There is no zombie apocalypse, and I will have to pay my credit card bill after all.  Twitter reports suggest New Zealand has escaped without harm.  My looting plans have not come to fruition.